There's no reason for me to be so nervous. I've raced so many times that I know what to expect. It's not like I'm ever in the running for some huge prize or ever in real danger. (I'm not talking about triathlons; I've felt like I was going to die during a triathlon.)
The nerves stem from the build-up to that moment and the immediate possibilities. All that training time, the thrill of race day, and the "will I be able to push through the pain and PR?" question.
Ah, pushing through the pain. As a runner, the thought of pain scares and excites me. It scares me because I don't like to hurt. But it excites me because I know if I work really hard and play mind games, I can overcome it.
This mentality towards pain goes beyond running. Anytime I have to do something that might be painful, I fear it but also know I'm strong enough to do it.
I bring this up now because I got good news on the fertility front
One follicle on my right ovary actually responded to my meds and grew to a decent size. My blood work confirmed that I was nearing ovulation. To give my body a push, my doctor told me to give myself a trigger shot last night.
One problem, I'm so scared of shots (this coming from the girl who's gotten 4 tattoos. I make no sense.)
I completely freaked out and had to wait for my husband to get home to give it to me. I thought I was going to puncture some organ, have a horrible reaction, or pass out from fear.
Well, I was a big baby for no reason. I didn't even feel the stupid thing. The injection site stung for an hour after, but it was such a big let down.
Someone was concerned about me.
I'll find out in a week if I actually ovulated. I'm so hopeful. This may be the first time I ovulate ever.
Does running affect how you think about pain? I think endurance athletes are tough cookies, despite how I acted last night